Tracy for Granted: The Age of Entitlement

Many years ago, when I lived in Washington D.C., I decided to use my lunch hour to go to the post office to get my passport for an upcoming trip overseas. When I arrived at the post office, I found that about one hundred other people had the same idea. This was before the invention of the iPhone with the lovely game apps or the Kindle, so there was little a person could do to pass the time in the long lines. After about 20 minutes of waiting, people were starting to get impatient. This man behind me was starting to huff, stating that he had a vote he had to get back to Capitol Hill to attend. This man became increasingly more impatient, shifting his weight from foot to foot and huffing and puffing even more. He clearly had never been taught to self soothe as a baby. As we were moving closer to the front desk, he completely lost his patience and declared loudly that he had to be somewhere almost immediately and that because he worked for a Senator, he should be moved to the head of the line. The lady at the front of the line looked back, completely unfazed, and said, “You can go ahead of me. I am late for my chemotherapy treatment for my Stage 4 lung cancer, but you obviously have a more important place to be.” We all laughed, but shockingly, the man had the gall to accept her offer and moved to the front of the line.

I often remember this story when I am in a situation completely out of my control and am forced to wait in line – be it traffic due to construction, the line at a dry cleaner or to put my name in for a table at a restaurant. This story showed me, quite clearly, that everyone has somewhere to be, something to do, or has someone waiting for them. Perhaps if we did not stuff our schedules the way we try to fit the most dishes in a dishwasher, we might have a more carefree attitude towards these situations.

This story also gets me thinking, what in the world is wrong with us, as a society, that we all feel entitled to be first in every line without having to wait? Another story I heard on the radio, when I lived in Dallas, discussed a man driving home from the hospital with his wife and newborn baby girl. They had twins, but the other baby had died to a premature birth. They had waited months for their other baby girl to be healthy enough to be released so they could get home and start being a family. On the way home, a man in a truck grew angry at how slow they were driving. Mind you, they were driving the speed limit. This man in the truck pulled next to them, took out a pistol and shot the father, paralyzing him for life. Now, this is an extreme example, but seriously, where in the world could this man have been driving to that warranted this absurd reaction to driving slow?

Our society today is about not waiting for anything. If you don’t want to get in your car and go shopping, you can go online. If you don’t want to cook a meal, you can buy prepared meals from restaurants; have them delivered to your house, or get fast food. In New York City, you can even have McDonald’s delivered to you! If you want a quick exit from your marriage, there are plenty of flights to Barbados to get quickie divorces. We have computers that work at the speed of light, all at the click of a button or the touch of an icon, and we have what we want immediately. We are a generation of conveniences which has resulted in us being people intolerant of inconvenience.

The other aspect of entitlement is the people who complain about everything. I have friends who have survived some of life’s cruelest times and never complained. On the other side, I have friends who complain about the smallest things that make me wince with frustration. I have been blessed with people who love me and support me. My husband and I are blessed with educations that allow us to have good jobs that put a roof over our family’s heads and food in our mouths. We are blessed with health and healthy children. Every night I get to hug my children tightly and kiss them until they are exhausted by it. I am privileged with the physical ability to ride my bike with my kids when we take my son to school. I get to buy fresh foods from our local farmers and do what I love to do most: cook for my family. We are blessed; we truly have nothing of significance to complain about. I know people with more than us, who complain more. I know people with less than us, who complain less. Perhaps, the more you have, the more you are convenienced, the more you feel entitled?

Over the past few years, my friends have lost their children, some born, some not. Friends have lost their dearest loved husbands, wives or partners. Other friends have been faced with the excruciating challenge of not being able to walk again, cancer that may end their lives and leave children behind, or, even worse, watch their own children battle cancer. I am fortunate to not be facing these challenges right now.

There are people who are entitled to be at the first of the line and who are entitled to complain. So, if we are not one of these below, or someone else battling something truly life altering, then we need to build a bridge and get over ourselves and sit tight until it’s our turn.